Ladies and gentlemen, the Goat Sketch. Many thanks to Decent Humans for filming this! Be sure to check out their other work as well.
Tag: satire
Fifteen Resolutions for 2015
This year, I resolve to: Exercise my right to chicken done right Stop paying too much for car insurance by not having car insurance Cut down on the time I spend spying on my neighbors Remind myself again why I needed a Master's degree Adjust my attitude so that my boring and nowhere job is … Continue reading Fifteen Resolutions for 2015
Random Thoughts, 9 December 2014
If the Atlantic, Pacific and Indian Oceans are connected, why are they considered three different oceans? I think a better term for rush hour would be sitting in traffic wasting time and fuel hour. Giving GI Joe kung-fu grip probably wasn't as earth-shattering as it once seemed. I wonder what the six million dollar man … Continue reading Random Thoughts, 9 December 2014
A Guide for Handling Assassins from the Future
Note: This article appears in an updated version in my essay collection The Cheese Toast Project, available in print from online bookstores, and in print and Kindle at Amazon. While it cannot be definitively proven that the future has already happened, we can be certain that the future will arrive at some point, and with … Continue reading A Guide for Handling Assassins from the Future
Random Thoughts, 26 September 2014
Pumpkin spice is essentially nutmeg. Why is it no one's ever made a movie out of School House Rock? It turns out that the tenth rule of Fight Club is that the loser must spring for crackers and cheese whiz. I wonder what it would take to actually shock a monkey? Why is it always … Continue reading Random Thoughts, 26 September 2014
Office Politics: Nelson Cabot
Nelson Cabot was an obscure man, living an obscure life, in an obscure section of Northeast Atlanta. A man of certain habits, he arose each morning at five-o-clock sharp, prepared the same breakfast of toast, poached eggs, ham, and coffee, and shaved, showered, and dressed with the same military regularity he'd practiced since his stint … Continue reading Office Politics: Nelson Cabot
Real Bible Studies: The Tower of Babel
Following the story of the flood, Genesis 10 goes into the descendants of Noah's sons, Shem, Japheth, and Ham. Ham's son Canaan, previously cursed by Noah for something his father actually did, is cited as the progenitor of many of the tribes the Israelites will have issues with as they move into the "promised land" … Continue reading Real Bible Studies: The Tower of Babel
Random Thoughts, 2 September 2014
Why is it that fitted sheets never fit? How can people say there's no global warming, with so many people pouring ice on themselves? Isn't it odd that on Labor Day, people get the day off from work? Can anyone remember why we're supposed to be mad at Cuba? Did the Spice Girls ever get … Continue reading Random Thoughts, 2 September 2014
Force of Habit
I'm normally a creature of habit; I buy fruit and don't eat it; I always set the alarm clock earlier than I should, then hit the snooze button until I feel like getting up; I always buy the same brand of toothpaste, even if there are deals on other brands. This behavior on my part … Continue reading Force of Habit
Random Thoughts, 19 August 2014
If the original Terminator had been set in 2014, Skynet could have easily located Sarah Connor on FourSquare.I wonder why there's never been a Bigfoot siting in Miami.For the past few years, Kentucky Fried Chicken has been using as its theme song Sweet Home Alabama. Let that sink in for a minute.I'm willing to bet … Continue reading Random Thoughts, 19 August 2014